Answer: Kazakhstan

When it comes to winning the don’t-touch-the-ocean contest, the massive central Asian country of Kazakhstan wins on not one but two counts. First, it’s the largest completely landlocked country in the world thanks to its central location and total area of 1,052,100 square miles (2,724,900 square kilometers).

On top of winning that designation, it’s also the largest landlocked country that exists on two continents simultaneously (the other country is Azerbaijan). Thanks to a small slice of the country removed from the heartland by the the Ural River, Kazakhstan is both the largest landlocked country in the world, in Asia, and in Europe, as the Ural River is the continental boundary between Europe and Asia.

Although they’re most certainly landlocked, they do get a consolation prize of sorts. The Caspian Sea, bordering the far southwestern edge of Kazakhstan, is the largest inland body of water in the world boasting an area (catchment area) of 1,400,000 square miles (3,626,000 square kilometers) and 4,300 miles (7,000 kilometers) of shoreline. They might not get in any transoceanic shipping any time soon, but at least there’s always a holiday weekend at the beach on the horizon.